Audition Starts

“Maybe I should tryout for the role of hero’s mum when we get there.” Archana announced out of the blue while passively looking out the car window looking at the passing buildings.

“What?” I spat out incredulously slowing down my second-hand Maruthi Zen car to a slow pace to look at my dear wife to see if she has finally gone nuts. 

Archana turned her gaze to look at me with gleaming eyes and started earnestly. “Think about it. Most of the young women that would show up for the audition will be trying their hand at the heroine role. And the slightly older ones will try out for role of hero’s older sister. Hardly any girl would want to audition for the role of hero’s mum. I am also a mother. So…”

“ARCHANA….YOU ARE THIRTY-FIVE.”  I interrupt her loudly. “Don’t be absurd. You hardly even look your own age. Nobody would guess you are over 30 as it is and you want to play the role of a 60-year-something woman? ”

She smiles pleased at the indirect compliment on her looks and says while shrugging “Calm down babe. It was just an idea. I just wanted to increase my odds. From what I found out from Ramya, there is only a handful of prominent female roles in the movie. I just wanted to make sure I got something that gets us some substantial money.”

I softened as I understood where she was coming from. She was more concerned about bagging the best deal for us than her self-image. 

My wife  Archana was a trained classical dancer. She taught classical dance at a small dance school in the village. One of her students, a beautiful young girl named Ramya told Archana about this audition that was happening in the city for an upcoming south indian movie about a week ago. Apparently, they were head-hunting for newcomers for a variety of different roles in the movie including that of the heroine. Ramya who was an aspiring actress and a model was already planning to attend and knowing Archana’s skills she suggested Archana should try out for a role as well. Archana laughed it off then, finding the whole idea absurd. She told me about it later in the night as a sort of joke. But I, on the other hand, who have always been an admirer of her dancing and expressive skills, thought it was a good opportunity for her.  After a lengthy discussion, I convinced her it was worth a try at least for the money involved. In our current situation, any amount of additional money we can find would be a huge relief.

After a couple of hours of expert maneuvering around the busy Banglore traffic, we finally managed to reach the studio where the audition was happening. I felt self-conscious parking my little scratched car next to the rows of expensive ones that were parked in the parking lot. A feeling that only grew with each passing second as we stepped out and made our way toward the entrance of the fancy glass building. Everybody seemed so stylishly dressed and well-groomed. I felt so out of place in my modest clothes which were just a plain maroon shirt inserted into black trousers. And based on how Archana was clutching my elbows and clinging close to me as we walked, I could tell she too was feeling the same. Which was sort of absurd because unlike me she was looking gorgeous and classy in a beautiful peacock blue chiffon saree.

After filling out some forms Archana was given a large badge with the number 83 written on it and was directed toward the third floor of the giant building where the auditions for all the side roles were taking place. There were already a lot of people waiting for their turns when we arrived. So it wasn’t until almost 2 hours later Archana’s number was called. Archana visibly tensed and looked at me nervously.

“Relax !! You are gonna do great. Good luck.” I said standing up along with her and squeezing her hand. She nodded silently and took a couple of deep breaths before drawing herself to her full height and followed the lady that called out her number into the audition room. I began pacing outside silently like a man awaiting the arrival of his newborn as I waited for her to come back out, drawing the irritating glance of others who were waiting for their turn. I paid them no heed and continued to pace up and down the corridor. 

After about 20 minutes the door finally opened and a beaming Archana walked out grinning ear to ear. She came straight towards me, caught my hand, and immediately began dragging me towards the lift excitedly.  “Woaa Woaa !! Slow down honey !! What happened? How did it go?? And where the hell are you pulling me?” I asked bewildered. 

“Just follow me. I will tell you everything on the way.”  She said cryptically. 

As soon as we got inside the lift and the doors closed Archana cheered happily and threw her hands around me hugging me close. I hugged her back laughing and said “I take it you got a role?”. 

“Even better. They loved my performance so much that they want me to tryout in the audition for the female lead of the movie as well. They think I got a real shot at it. It is happening on the 10th floor and the director of the movie himself is conducting it. We are headed there right now.”

“Woaa !! Really?” I ask, stunned. 

“Yes, I was shocked too. Apparently, the hero of this movie is someone in his fifties. So they actually prefer a middle-aged woman to do the role of female lead so that it won’t look too weird on screen.”

I struggled to process the sudden turn of events.  I know I was supposed to be happy for her but what I was actually feeling was alarm. My wife, a heroine? 

“That ….That really is amazing….But…”. 

Just then the lift door opened again and she resumed dragging me along with her. “Come fast….Assistant Director said he would phone Raghav sir and arrange for me to have the audition right away. So we won’t have to wait long.”

“Raghav sir?” 

“Yes. That is the name of the director. Raghavendra or something.”

I froze on my tracks truly shocked now. “You mean Raghavendra Rao?”

“Ah yes. That is his name. You know him? They said he is a veteran movie director in telugu film industry. ”

“Woa, Of course, I know him. I am a big fan of his works. He is a legendary director in telugu cinema. ” I say amazed. 

Archana jumps up and down excitedly. “So it’s true? He really is a great director? I thought they were bluffing. This is unbelievable. Come on let’s get inside fast.” She said dragging me the rest of the way.

Soon we arrived at a room that can only be described as heaven for someone like me. The room was filled with gorgeous women, all wearing some sort of belly-baring outfits – Crop tops, Sarees, Lehengas…. I have never seen so many female navels in one place before. 

“Ouch !!” I yelped in pain as I felt a sharp pinch on my arm. 

“Quit staring !!” Archana hissed while staring daggers at me although with a knowing smile playing on her lips.  Being my wife, there was nobody else in the world that knew about my crazy navel fetish better than she did. I pouted my lips rubbing my sore arm.

Suddenly I froze as a realization struck me. I remembered exactly why director Raghavendra Rao was so famous, and why I was one of the biggest fans of his works. I looked around at all the navel-baring girls in the room once again, this time with a dawning realization of why they were all dressed like that. Just then the door opened up and a flushed and disheveled-looking young girl who had just finished her audition walked out.  She was surreptitiously rubbing her abdominal area just over her navel as she walked past us. I began to get an inkling of what this heroine audition may consist of. 

Damn  !! I have to stop Archana !!

“NUMBER EIGHTY THREE…”  a short woman with a clipboard yelled out from the doorway just as turned towards Archana and opened by mouth to warn her.

“HERE MAM !!” Archana yelled back excitedly raising her arm and rushing towards her already. 

SHIT !!!